October 9,2018 when my life changed in an instant.I woke up at about 2:00 a.m. and I wasn't able to move my left arm and leg. I tried to tell my husband who was sleeping beside me but my mouth can't open wide to say a word. So, I used my right arm and tried to hit my husband with all my strength to wake him up. He got up and turned the lights on and I tried to tell him I can't move the left side of my body. He can't understand me but I keep talking anyway. Then he finally realized that I can't open my mouth and called my youngest son who was sleeping in the next room.
My husband and my son finally recognized my symptoms and called 911 immediately. Ten minutes later the ambulance came. I was rushed to the ER and doctors confirmed that I was having a stroke. I was so scared because I was lying there and I was not able to control my body anymore. I told the doctors to help me because something is going on inside and outside my body and I have no control of my body anymore. I was not sure if they understood me because my left jaw was drooping and I can't talked but I tried to talk. After that I got so tired and weak that I don't remember anything anymore.
The last thing I remembered was when the doctor came and told me they are giving me TPA and after that I felt calm and relax. My arm and leg were not trying to move by itself anymore. My emotions inside was not all over anymore. It was so scary.
Then, after all the blood works, two CT Scan, MRI, and heaven knows what else I was transferred to my room in the hospital the next day. By then it was made clear to me that I had an ischemic stroke caused by high blood pressure,high blood sugar and high cholesterol.Who knew! I did not know. I never have any symptoms. But I have family history of stroke and heart disease. My mother had 3 strokes before she passed away at age 71 years old. Her mother (my grandmother ) passed away of heart attack at age 30. So, I guess now is my turn. There's no escape for me. It runs in my veins. It's in my blood.
Life is challenging and difficult after stroke. But you can choose to be a fighter or a loser. But I choose to be a #strokefighter . I may not have full use of my left arm and leg but I don't let stroke keep me down.Recovery is scary but so is remaining exactly the same. That's why I fight!
It's been 14 months post stroke and I still choose to live and to thrive. It's not easy and I get scared sometimes but I learn to use fear to live with renewed purpose and a new outlook in life.
At first it was scary and devastating. I wonder if I can do this. I wonder if I can get out of my wheelchair. I wonder if I'll be able to walk again. If I can be normal again... but as time goes by I realized that I'm actually doing it. I walked out of my wheelchair, move my fingers and arm and my shoulder. I'm walking now sometimes without my cane. I can do more things with my left arm like cooking, bathing,washing dishes and wiping kitchen counter tops.
My stroke change my perspective in life. Because of my stroke I learn how to have a healthy lifestyle. I learn how to slow down and stay away from stress. I learn how to take care of myself and put myself first.
Brain trauma hits everyone differently. While some turn right around and decide this is not where I end, it takes others awhile to recover. Some, including me,go through depression and anxiety. One thing we can all do is to find something that makes us happy and brings us joy. Mine is in this picture. This was 6 months after my stroke and I went to my favorite Tulip Garden and walk with my cane for the first time. It really made me happy.
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